How would you choose?

My sister asked me a question tonight, "Have you thought of who would take the kids if something happened to you and Bruce?" I have thought about it here and there but we have never really sat down and had that kind of conversation. I mean who wants to? Who wants to make a plan like that? No one, but sometimes they are necessary and that is a scary thing. How do you even go about finding the right couple to raise your kids as if they were theirs? Do you look at family? Do you turn to friends? Whose feelings would be hurt if they weren't chosen? It gives me anxiety to even think about it. My kids are everything, as I am sure that yours are as well. But honestly how do you choose? K is so strong willed, will only do things if it is her way. B is so tender-hearted, he always wants to make things better. I only ever want the best for them. Heavenly Father blessed me with them because I am the best mother for them. I am what they need. How do you choose the person that will fill your shoes as a mother? He gave me K and B because they are who I needed. I know I struggle with keeping my temper in check, and keeping the house in order but I do love them so very much. They test my limits daily but they also make me so proud as well. Like take this morning for instance. I was trying to hurry and get out of the house by 11:30am to get my sister and her kids picked up so that we could surprise my mom for her birthday, the kids had other plans. While I was trying, and I stress trying, to put on my make up this morning B was into all of it. He pulled out all my eyeshadow primers and pulled the lids off of every single one. He then took my concealer out to K who decided that it would make perfect lipstick. She of course thought she did an amazing job and looked just beautiful. After I took pictures, you know for evidence later on, I finally got K and B to sit and watch cartoons so that I could continue on with what I was doing. K told me she needed to go potty, when she got to the bathroom instead of sitting on the toilet she peed on the floor. By this time I was so over it and ready to go back to bed. She thought it would be a good idea to clean it up herself. So she got one of my cleaning scrub brushes and pushed it all over the bathroom floor, mixed in with water that she got out of the toilet of course. B decided to "help" her, he mostly just slid on the floor and put random things in the toilet one thing being my melon baller. I was more than ready to hide under the covers now. K finally came out of the bathroom, came into my room and proceeded to pee on the carpet. All I kept repeating to myself was I am never going to get out of here. By the time we finally got loaded into the car it was past noon. My patience was shot, I desperately needed to go to my happy place Soda Crazy. This place is amazing! I can't stress how much I love this place. The owners are so sweet and friendly. The environment is so welcoming. As soon and I pull up to the drive through window they know who I am and what I would like, seriously love them. After all of the chaos this morning the day actually went well. I had fun hanging out and joking with my sisters, K and B always love playing at their cousins house. It is such a blessing having family so close. My kids will get to grow up being close to family and cousins who are close in age and who will stick up for them. My sister's oldest son, T, is going through some very hard trials right now. It seems like all he knows since starting school is bullies, and being bullied. They only do it because of his size. He isn't the same height as most 5th graders, he is much smaller. I know how hard it is to go to school and be bullied, and know that they are laughing at you and you don't fit in. I also know that he will be such a support to my kids. My kids are on the small size as well. K is just barely fitting into size 3 clothing and she will be 4 next week. B is still in 12month clothing and he will be 2 in June. They will need him, he will need to show them that it isn't your size that determines how special you are or what you are capable of. Heavenly Father has a plan for all 3 of them, some day we will get to see a little more of what that is. But until then all we can do is support T and let him know that he does have people on his side and in his corner. He will always have someone to stick up for him and be there when needed. I try to pull him aside when ever I can to have little talks about life, and depression, and the future. I keep reminding him that he will do great things despite his size. His size does not determine the place he will have in the future and that he is an amazing boy. I know that in the future he will understand and he will see how his trials helped to shape him into someone amazing. But until then he will continue to struggle daily with bullies and self-esteem. Sorry I went off on a bit of a tangent there. My sister and her husband and finally decided who will take their kids in case the worst happens. They have picked some really special who would love their kids so dearly. But I keep coming back to where to begin the deciding process, and I probably will for a while. It's getting late and the morning comes quickly with children. Tomorrow will be a better day. I will leave you with this, How would YOU choose the people to take your kids if the worst were to happen...?